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Auto Be More Assertive

I have always thought that love was more important than possessions so I was understanding when the action (or should I say, non-action) of Kate, my wife, resulted in a car “accident.”

The car was an Acura Legend that I took very good care of. Each Saturday morning I lugged a bucket of soapy hot water to the garage so that Kate could wash and detail our lovely two door coupe.

Several of our neighbors suggested that I take the Legend to a car wash. How foolish.

The characters that work in car washes often smudge cars. They only work for money. They have no pride of ownership.

As I told Kate, a car is an investment and as such should be carefully maintained. Best to do it ourselves.

Last Sunday I told Kate I was going to the movies. She asked me if she could come. I agreed for she had just polished and vacuumed the car and I have always felt that one of the best ways to maintain harmony in a home is to reinforce positive activity.

Realizing that the Acura needed an oil change I drove the car to our mechanic’s service station in the San Fernando Valley. Kate followed me in an old clunker that her folks had given her.

I parked the Acura in front of our mechanic’s shop and slipped the keys under his door. “Okay,” I said to Kate. “Let’s go see that movie.”

“I don’t think the car is safe there,” she said.

“Pleeeeze. We are two blocks from one of the biggest police stations in the world,” I said.

“But that model is easy to steal and kids love to grab them because they can sell the parts,” said Kate.

“I’m not going to take two automobiles to the movies. Besides by leaving the car here, our mechanic can get started first thing when he opens Monday morning.”

“It’s one of the hottest cars to steal,” said Kate. “I don’t feel good about leaving it in an alley.”

“Okay, then you can drive it home and I’ll go to the movie by myself,” I said. “Is that what you want?”

“No,” she said. “I want to see the movie with you.”

“Then leave the car here and let’s go,” I said.

“We could take it with us to the movie and then I’ll drive it down in the morning.”

“Kate, we are on the verge of a war with the Middle East because of fuel shortages. Why would you waste all that gas? What are you, a Taliban?”

“You win,” she said.

We saw the movie and had a pleasant evening.

Around midnight the Acura was stolen.

It broke my heart. I loved that car.

If Kate had only been a tiny bit more assertive, we would have still had that car. But, as I said, love is more important than possessions so I am not going to scold her much more.

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