FORD — R.I.P.
President Ford had a lot to say about certain politicians — in nearly all cases his remarks were made to reporters with the stipulation that they not be revealed until after Mr. Ford’s death.
Ford said Carter was a “disaster” and our best president was Dwight D. Eisenhower.
Ford thought Clinton was average and John Kennedy was overrated.
My wife and I were guests at the White House during Ford’s tenure and although we were not part of the Washington elite I was surprised to learn that President Ford wrote some things about Kate and me.
The former president stipulated that these things not be revealed until after his death.
Well, since he’s with the angels now, the world should be aware that President Ford said that my wife, Kate, “interfered too much when I was cooking.”
The president said it was unforgivable that Kate would hover around the kitchen and constantly re-spice things I was cooking.
“It makes no sense for Kate to add salt to a dish that Jaron is making,” he said.
“Especially if she does not taste the dish first. Kate behaves in a shameful manner when Jaron prepares one of his signature dishes, it’s probably something Kate picked up from her own mother who insists on over salting everything.”
The former president also said that Kate was disorganized. “I don’t know how anyone could be so messy.”
“She never tidies up yet criticizes poor Jaron for throwing out what appears to be junk. Sure, sometimes he throws out so-called good stuff but generally he does it so the place will not be so messy.”
President Ford also said that Kate whined too much. “I don’t know what she has to whine about,” said the nation’s 38th president. “Jaron is a brilliant writer, as witty as Twain and as insightful as Shakespeare.”
“He is a national treasure and wives of national treasures need to recognize that sometimes national treasures don’t take out the garbage exactly on time or even floss when they are supposed to.”
May the great man rest in peace.
Click one of the above to see some of my work.
You can buy one of my novels here. If you
can't afford it, write me a funny
note and I'll send you a PDF
of the novel.
Rather than beg one million people to donate a dollar each, I'd like one billionaire (or two or even three) to simply give me a million buck$. You know who you are.