The Cloud Has Me by the Fingers
Written by
jaron summers © 2025
I keep hearing that artificial intelligence will enslave humanity, run amok, and maybe start charging us rent to think.
But at 83‑years‑young (young? I’ve got socks older than my doctor), I’ve discovered a far more terrifying truth: AI already owns my fingers — and I love it.
It began with a gadget the salesman swore would “triple my productivity.” Looked like a cross between piano wires and a fishing rig.
“Just slip these strings on your hands,” he said. “AI will guide your typing.”
I thought it was a new ergonomic keyboard. Turns out I signed up to be a marionette for the Cloud.
And it’s wonderful. My essays used to wander like a blind cow in a corn maze. Now, thanks to the gentle tugs from above, my prose waltzes like Fred Astaire.
I’ll type “Artificial intelligence is a danger to—” and the Cloud tugs my pinky so it becomes “—a delightful helper who folds my socks.” Pulitzer‑worthy stuff.
It’s like having Mark Twain and a polite squid co‑authoring my work.
People ask, “Don’t you resent being controlled?”
Please. I’ve been married for six decades. Puppet strings are an upgrade.
AI isn’t sinister. Every morning it tugs my index finger meaning “stretch.”
A wiggle of the thumb means “drink lemon water.”
When my cat strolls across the keyboard, the Cloud lifts all my strings at once so I don’t type “js;dlfkjsdlkfj” again.
Domination?
No.
Concierge service.
My friends whisper, “What if AI becomes self‑aware?”
I laugh so hard my strings get tangled.
Self‑aware? It already knows my shoulder hurts in the rain, my wife’s birthday is in December, and I need a bathroom break every 45 minutes. AI doesn’t want to enslave me. It wants to keep me regular.
Someday they’ll write history books about this: “While others panicked about AI, one old man trusted it completely.”
Under the caption: a picture of me, strings taut, smiling, typing under a blue‑and‑orange cloud.
Living proof that surrendering to AI’s puppet strings isn’t the end of human freedom — it’s the beginning of better spell‑check.
So yes, AI is the puppet master. But this puppet writes faster, thinks clearer, and hasn’t accidentally ordered kale in months.
If that’s world domination, sign me up
