Kona Notes

My wife, Kate, and I often spend time in Kona. Here are a few notes on the place.


Sun 30/01/11 — my journal

…Kate and I are in Kona looking after chickens, dogs, cats and fending off wild pigs at the 1200 foot level of the island.

notes-2The nights are cool and the roosters are relentless. They bark all night.

Huge 300-pound pigs charge through the gardens…I plan to murder one and eat him.

There is a guy, Henry, down the road who is a part-time butcher and accountant. Two seemingly different vocations but I suspect quite similar.

Henry says he will help dress the dead pig when I get it that way — I am not quite sure how to make the pig, dead. Or what kind of dress to buy for it.


email to John B. — an avid astronomer who has been a special guest at the world famous observatory here on the Big Island.

Dear John,

…I also want to drive up the hill and check out the telescope. Thirty Meter Telescope.

notes-3According to my research they need me to recalibrate their equipment. As you know, my computations indicate Pluto is actually a small sun.

Most people have assumed it was a planet, asteroid or something. I will set things right and fine tune their telescope gears with my 36-inch monkey wrench if you can get me a pass to the mechanical area.

Your friend in science,

Jaron, VP — Junior Astronomy Club of Canada.

(I made up the part about belonging to the astronomy club.)

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