One Inch from the end

As my many followers (six) and fans (four) know Donald Trump often phones me for guidance. I decided to record our conversations to save NSA from doing it. In California it’s okay to record your side of a phone call. Following is my one-sided exchange with the president of these United States. I substituted “yadie” for what President Trump said.  You’ll get the gist of his remarks from my answers. Me: I think, Sir, that we have twenty MOABs.  Why? The President:  yadie, yadie, yadie. Me: I get it, you want to crazy glue all our MOABs together to make a big explosion.  One that would obliterate Pyongyang, and its four million residents?  

  The President: Yadie, yadie, yadie … followed by hysterical mirth. Me: That would prove you’re a tough guy, hands down, but Crazy Kim Jong-un, who runs North Korea and  goes to the same hair stylists as you do, would retaliate.  He has the 4th largest army in the world. The President: Yadie? Me: He could wipe out Seoul which has about 50,000,000 South Koreans.  Plus we have thousands of Americans along the border of South Korea. The President: Yadie? Me: The Americans are part of our army. The President: Yadie? Me: How close is South Korea to North Korea, Sir?  It’s about one inch. The President: Yadie?  (Followed by muffled cussing.) Me: I’m pretty sure about the one inch.  I was just looking at an aerial view in National Geographic. The President: Yadie? Me: It’s a magazine, Sir.  It comes out every month. The President: Yadie? Me:  That’s another bold move, Sir.  But if you blew up the magazine’s main office, you might destroy a good deal of Washington, DC.     …to be continued