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A Shot in the Dark

We live in an incredible age on an incredible planet.

Our world has its dilemmas. We humans can kill almost anything (from elephants to mosquitoes).

They can also kill us.

Image result for jpeg mosquito

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a3Yr2Nck0c0

And, if we get feisty, we have the weapons to kill 100 billion humans in an hour.

Those large numbers won’t happen since there are only about 7.4 billion of us.

Rest easy.

Lots of things can snuff our lives (from elephants to mosquitoes).

Turns out the mosquitos don’t kill us.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IkmjCmvfeFI

A tiny virus that often dwells in the mosquito has killed about six million of us.  That organism is called the coronavirus and looks like a crown.

Also, we cough on each other. And probably do far more invasive things if we’re familiar with the Karma Sutra.

A pharmacist gave Kate, and me, our fifth vaccination yesterday.  It’s to protect us from new variants of the Coronavirus.

Alas, there is simply not enough time for me to check all the side effects of all our meds.

So it’s my habit to try out any and all new meds and medical sideroads my doctor suggests.

Afterward, I check to see possible side effects. Most people do this.

After all, you can’t figure out what you physician will really shoot you full of until he does it.

The rumor of side effects with the latest vaccination has to do with mice.

No worries. Seems that the latest vaccine is probably safe for mice. Didn’t kill any of them.   Based on the CFDC six-mouse test, the USA felt safe to begin injecting millions of people with this new vaccine.

I wondered why the CFDC didn’t test the wonder vaccine on humans.

Kate says the CFCD has have already started to test the efficacy of the vaccine on humans.

“Who would volunteer for such a thing?” I asked.

“I guess we did,” said Kate.

A mouse lives about two years when they live in your house.  But if they’re lab mice, they can live three or more years.

As the mice go, so could the human race.  This is highly useful information.

‘As the mice go, so could the human race.’

I phoned the CFDC to find out how the six test mice used in the clinical tests were doing.

I talked to a super bright scientist who is also a phone operator at the CFCD and asked for the names of the mice, who, along with Kate and me, have kind of involuntarily entrusted our bodies to medical science to see what would happen after we absorbed the fifth squirt of the vaccine.

If the mice all perished, Kate and I might get blood transfusions or smelling salts. Or finish our wills and
trusts.

The nice lady at the CFDC said no one knew where the test mice were. None of the tiny rodents were given names that could be shared with the public.

I asked what symptoms we would “present” if our latest vaccination had a problem.

She said the vaccine manipulated our DNA or something, `and we might exhibit slight headaches, muscle soreness, and minor mouse characteristics. After all, the vaccine might be able to modify our DNA.

“How will we know if that happens?” I asked.

“You could suddenly develop an extreme craving for cheese.”

I stopped eating my third helping of mac and cheese.

Cute rat chef with cheese

 

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