INVESTMENT SECRETS
written by
jaron summers (c) 20223
I’ve spent what feels like a lifetime trying to figure out the best times to buy and sell stocks. This fancy dance is called market timing.
The investing bigwigs, like Warren Buffet (ever heard of him? Yeah, he’s just one of the richest folks on Earth), don’t really buy into this whole timing thing. He’s more of a ‘buy and forget for two decades’ type. Me? I once boldly declared that Amazon would plummet to less than twenty-five bucks. Spoiler alert: It didn’t.
Despite my chest-thumping, picking winners and losers isn’t exactly my superpower. I even goofed up predicting gold prices. Whoops!
Remember Cisco? I bought it when it was flying high at $60, only to watch it nosedive to about $10. If only I’d had the foresight (or a crystal ball), I could’ve made a killing by selling short. But like most folks, I’m not exactly a fortune teller.
Speaking of fortune-telling, ever noticed how in poker, the pros read other players? Uncle Jack coughs when he’s bluffing, and Aunt Bee frowns with aces up her sleeve.
But stocks? They’re trickier. No coughs or frowns to help us out. Is it high hemlines or CEOs splurging on jets that signal a market crash? Nah, none of these quirky indicators really work.
I’ve got a new theory, though. Follow a repo man or woman. You know, the ones who sneak up on folks who’ve missed one too many car payments.
Vehicle repo is booming. In 2022, a car was stolen every 30 seconds, but a car was ‘popped’ (repossessed) every 20 seconds!
Here’s my big tip: Keep an eye on those flashy corporate execs buying swanky cars. When the economy dips, their fancy rides are the first to go. If you spot a repo dude popping cars at a company’s parking lot, you know that company’s in trouble.
But hey, not all’s doom and gloom. If you want to invest in a company on the rise, buddy up with the folks in the shipping department.
More shipments mean business is booming, and that’s usually good news for the stock.
This gem of a tip comes from my second cousin, a whip-smart fund manager. It’s all about knowing the right people, not necessarily the CEOs.
Of course, my strategy isn’t foolproof. Imagine someone repossessing my SUV. I’d just park it at a successful company’s lot to throw them off.
And what if those busy shipping clerks are actually part of a grand heist, sending all the goods to a gang of crooks? Your investment could crash faster than you can say “inside job.”
Maybe the real secret is investing in yourself. Sure, you might end up broke, but hey, what’s the point of dying rich?