written by
jaron summers (c) 2024
Cousin Dora sent me this photo today. It’s me when I was about two. Ain’t I adorable? Today I am closer to 150 than two.
But what would I have told two-year-old me if such a thing were possible? Fun to think about but ….
Any suggestions I might have given that two year old could have resulted in my DEATH.
How about buy Microsoft?
Then I would have millions. I would have bought a Ferrari and wrapped it and my neck around a tree. I would be dead.
I am delighted the way things turned out. I have been lucky and blessed. I think time travel is overrated.
NOTE: My father was always cracking jokes. Soon after I was born he said I didn’t have a sense of humor.
He threatened to give me back to the stork. Said I could learn to fly and become a pilot. Then he flapped his arms and glued some feathers on my arms. I found this annoying.
I did not talk for the first four years of my life. They took me to a specialist and he asked me if I could hear him. I nodded, yes. “Can you SPEAK?” he asked.
I nodded yes, again.
“Then let’s hear from you!
So I barked. Everyone laughed.
That punchline had taken me most of my life to set up.
My father agreed I was funny but he said we would have to work on my timing.
I frowned, puzzled.
“Don’t you see? asked Dad. “If you can only come up with one joke every four years, by the time your 80, you’ll only have twenty jokes.
He was right. At that moment I vowed to live longer. So far it’s worked out.
